A booby paradise so bountiful it would make Space Dandy fall to his knees and weep.
What They Say:
The Queen’s Blade tournament may be over, but the stories of the contestants have barely begun. Unaware that fate is already conspiring to pit many of them against each other in the arena of war, the sword maidens scatter across the lands in search of fame, fortune, and adventure.
For some that comes sooner than expected, as Leina finds herself drawn to aid her sister, Elina, who’s been captured by Echidna. Tortured by the Swamp Witch, Melona focuses her anger on the absent Airi and plots an insidious revenge. But when confronted with their common enemies, how long can it be until they both seek to reunite with Menace?
And if that’s not enough trouble to be forming on the horizon, Nanael manages to get herself banished from Heaven and her goal of forming a harem of servants for herself proves to be anything but angelic. Finally, to provide the beasts to go along with the beauties, both Alleyene and Nowa and Tomoe and Aldra each find their separate journeys marred by encounters with different forms of tentacled monsters!
The Review:
Audio:
Queen’s Blade Beautiful Warriors offers a English 2.0 and Japanese 2.0 audio track. No more, no less. The quality of both recordings is fine, although the English voice cast favors a lot of breathy voices for most of its characters. However, the orgasmic moaning and sensual screaming as the girls duke it out transcends all language barriers.
Video:
The quality of the video is surprisingly clear for a DVD release. I barely noticed any artifacting when the on screen action got heavy and loaded with special effects. There isn’t much to detract from what is a pleasurable viewing experience (in more ways than one).
Packaging:
There’s nothing truly spectacular about the packing for Beautiful Warriors. It’s a simple two disc DVD case with artowkr that showcases the cast’s best assets. Melona with her trademark bunny ears and hand bra takes up a lot of prime real estate on the back cover as she snuggles close with the seductive Menace.
Menu:
The main menu is rather bare and plain, with the titles for each episode taking up most of the screen. There’s a static image of some of the Queen’s Blade characters, but on the whole there is nothing special about it.
Extras:
Apart from trailers for additional releases from Sentai, the only bonus attached to the disc is a clean closing animation, a sequence that features the female cast almost completely naked. Now you can enjoy the free spirited nudity without those pesky credits and subtitles getting in the way of the action!
Content: (please note that content portions of a review may contain spoilers)
Queen’s Blade really can’t be taken seriously. It’s like South Park, only with less profanity and more boobs. The animated adaptation of Hobby Japan’s line of visual combat books is so completely over the top and silly, it’s hard not to find some joy in the spectacle. The first two OVA collections present the saga of Laina, daughter of the prominent Vance family, who set out to participate in the Queen’s Blade tournament, an event held every four years to determine the next queen of the realm. Beautiful Warriors is set after Leina won the grand melee but abdicated the throne to her illegitimate sister (an action that sets up Queen’s Blade Rebellion). With the contest over, the OVA casts a spotlight certain characters from the series’ roster of buxom beauties as they make their journey home.
There is little in the way of memorable plot in these six episodes and almost all of them are standalone stories. This feels intentional so tricky things like “plot” and “story structure” don’t get in the way of the OVA’s bread and butter: breasts. Dozens and dozens of huge, bouncy, frame filling breasts. Fans of Queen’s Blade will expect nothing less but for those stumbling into the series blind, I hope you have a great appreciation for the female form because that is what you’re going to get. Each episode runs about thirty minutes and no moment is wasted in getting these women out of their clothing that are literally bursting at the seams. These girls are in desperate need of a good tailor as punches, sword slashes, and blunt trauma can rip the clothes right off their backs. I’m surprised clothes don’t rip and tear when they take a breath. Even the most menial of tasks are done topless or undergarments that leave little to the imagination. There are so many scenes like this that even I, a self professed lover of boobs, often pondered, “Do they really have to be naked for that?”
As if the rampant nudity isn’t enough, the strong sexual content adds a heavy layer of eroticism. All of the characters were designed with a maximum of sex appeal in mind, how else would it explain some of the costumes and outlandish body proportions? There’s Melona, the rabbit eared blob demoness who squirts acidic fluid from her nipples. Melpha, a priestess from Gainos with breasts so massive they rival those owned by the great Cattleya, performs holy miracles through sex poses (the pose battle between herself and corrupted angel Nanael is beyond ridiculous). Want more examples? There’s a monster that possesses victims by shoving a tendril down their throat and expelling a white fluid. Menace, the Egyptian warrior who teamed up with Airi and Melona, wastes the day away in utter opulence, surrounding by naked dancers and sips wine from the cleavage of her ladies in waiting. The only thing stopping Beautiful Warriors from being total pornography is the lack of any penetration (the demon’s earlier throat rape notwithstanding). Men are barely represented in the OVA, their presence quickly dismissed in favor of cramming bare breasts and sexy underwear in front of the camera. All of this stuff is meant to be incredibly sexy but these attempts often fall flat because scenarios are often too crazy and off the wall to be arousing.
It’s so easy to discredit Queen’s Blade as cheap pornography. The show gives the girls very few reasons to get undressed and the whole affair feels designed to get a particular rise out of the viewer. The end credits speak directly for that, as the sequence is nothing more than a five minute parade of sexy flesh. Beautiful Warriors, just like the rest of the Queen’s Blade series, is immature and prurient. But you know what? I loved it. Speaking to you as a friendly neighborhood pervert and lover of boobs. Beautiful Warriors is right up my alley. 180 minutes of nonstop breasts is something I look forward to and I really get into the series’ special brand of stupid silliness. Furthermore, Queen’s Blade is completely honest about its intentions and doesn’t try to hide what it wants to accomplish. The stories aren’t great and the battles are boring, but who cares? I certainly don’t. Queen’s Blade’s style of insane and inane sexiness is something I can get behind.
In Summary:
Queen’s Blade Beautiful Warriors will alienate viewers because of its unquestionably silly take on sexiness. However, happy perverts and boob fetishists will be absolutely delighted with the OVA’s vision of a booby paradise so bountiful, it’d make Space Dandy fall to his knees and weep.
Features:
Japanese 2.0 Language, English 2.0 Language, English Subtitles, Clean Opening Animation, Clean Closing Animation
Content Grade: A
Audio Grade: B
Video Grade: B
Packaging Grade: B-
Menu Grade: C
Extras Grade: B-
Released By: Sentai Filmworks
Release Date: December 2nd, 2014
MSRP: $29.99
Running Time: 180 minutes
Video Encoding: 480i/p MPEG2
Aspect Ratio: 1.78:1 Anamorphic Widescreen
Review Equipment:
Microsoft Xbox One with Blu-ray player app via HDMI, Panasonic 52″ LCD television
